hi hello! today is definitely a rough day in my neck of the woods and I have no idea why! does that ever happen? when you wake up and every little thing just rubs you the wrong way and you just want to turn your phone off and hide?
I’m going through a serious reflection period right now and it’s like it’s raining on me. maybe even pouring. I just don’t get it, everything is on the up and up, except me.
I don’t feel stressed, but I definitely feel tension. I’m not worried, but I’m anxious. I’m not PMSing and I have a great day ahead of me. I hate this fucking cold weather and every time it gets warm, it’s cold again.
part of me feels like I’m not doing enough with my life. sure I work, but I was so ambitious to open my own company so I did and now it’s on hold because, let’s face it, I was way too overzealous with it. there wasn’t even a business plan, I just dove right in. so I’m doing the right thing and taking a step back, but I feel like it’s taking forever. maybe I’ll spend an hour everyday working on it, but like actually dedicate myself to it – distraction free.
IN OTHER NEWS, for those of you who don’t know, I’m a vegetarian. I also have been slowly converting to gluten free. I do not have an allergy, just a sensitivity and for everyone who says I’m being dramatic – IDGAF because I feel great. however, this time I have cut out dairy and all gluten. so maybe that’s why I’m cranky.
one more tidbit, my birthday is coming up. I’m celebrating 25 again because last year was the worst year ever.
that’s enough for now, thanks for listening amigos
I really feel like the worst blogger in the world! it’s like I only write when I feel like it and that ain’t right. so my apologies, I am going to try to incorporate this in my weekly routine.
so what’s up?!
life is good, can’t complain. works been a bit crazy, but nothing unmanageable. I got my hair done a darker brown, which gives me a more down to earth vibe (LOL yeah, right).
I also joined a lacrosse team and have been going to the gym. I know curves are in, but love handles notsomuch. I’ve been pretty gluten free lately, which has been quite the experience.
HUGE SHOUTOUT TO RUDIS GLUTEN FREE BREADS & VANS GLUTEN FREE WAFFLES
I’m also finding the importance of spending time with my friends. I got emotional over an email chain between my parents and the people closest to me because of all the love. not sure when I became so sensitive, but hey, could be worse.
so all in all, my lovely readers, welcome back to the life of britt. I hope you’re along for the bumpy ride. and oh yea….
HAPPY FUCKIN FRIIIIIIIDDDDAAAAYYYYYY
quite frankly, it’s really kind of fcking cool that my blog gets 40 views a week even though I haven’t updated in a month. so thank you to everyone who keeps an eye out for me. it means a lot.
so what’s up? oh I don’t know. I’m sitting here rejoicing my arse off that wedding season is OVER. I have 1 more straggler in December but all is settled for now. except that people keep on telling us ‘next year your turn’ LOL.
I feel like I take advantage of this blog. it’s like oh shit something’s bothering. me, let me vent. and what brought me here today is that I’m overwhelmed. now that I’m getting back into the groove of my life, I am having a little trouble balancing. it’s not that I can’t do it or need help, I just need to get it off my chest. writing, especially for me, is über cleansing so I thank you all for listening.
although I have 78965336 things I want to accomplish in the span of 4 hours, I’m relaxed. I know what I need to do. no more back burner lifestyles.
there’s no better time to conquer the world than the present. besides, I love presents ;)
til next time
I don’t even know where to begin. it’s been a while, my apologies. I have quite this pressure in the side of my head. hoping it’s sinuses and not stress. I do have a lot on my plate, but it’s nothing I can’t handle.
keeping my fingers crossed for positive vibes these last two weeks. if everything works out, I’ll tell you all why then. if not, eh, I’ll tell you anyway.
I can’t help thinking about what true love really means. can you have love without trust? are we sometimes so blind and oblivious that we forgive too easily? how do I know if trust has been regained? will the trust gods come down and be like “ok britt, you can trust him again”?
and why are people so selfish? it’s not a good look. granted, I may be a little hypocritical since I do have my moments, but I know deep down I have a really good and strong heart and do want the best for others. how do we maintain that balance between doing good for others and still keeping ourselves a priority?
I’ll be totally honest: I’m blogging from the beach. I’m not religious, but I do feel blessed. a lot of people love me. I just have a hard time accepting the love from others. in fact, I’ve been known to push it away. which is so insane because who doesn’t want to be loved? I love people and I want them to feel it, so why can’t i do the same? I feel like somehow someway it trickles back down to self worth. maybe it’s time to dig a little deeper in my world of soul searching.
feedback always appreciated.
Well happy hump day, my beautiful loves. The past 10 days have been a bit of a journey. Guys are psycho, girls are psycho, even my god damn puppy is a psycho. How do we handle it? We don’t. We’re just all psycho living in a psychotic world. There’s nothing we can do but embrace it. We’re all in this together.
I chopped my hair short. Got rid of the dead ends and dead feelings. In a way, it kind of symbolizes a new me. Brittany 3.0. It’s more about representing who I want to be and where I want to be as opposed to being stuck in the same routine. I don’t think I’ve changed my hair style in years. So even though I’m being cute and trendy, there is much more behind my long bob.
MEN. Well, well, well. I still can’t seem to figure out why we let them dictate our lives.
“Oh I have 578495739 things to do today, but you want to hang out? OK I’m free.”
Raise your hand if you are guilty. If you’re not raising your hand, I will just guess you’re shy – totally OK. But since I know I’m guilty of it, I will digress. Even someone we are just getting to know has the capability to steal the show. Or maybe it’s someone you still hold a flame for. Either way, we’re letting guys get in the way of our lives and when we end up with a fizzled-out relationship or worse, a broken heart – it’s beyond that because we have let other parts of our lives down to please these guys.
I knowwww it’s August but, work with me here. Let’s do a past mid-year resolution. YOU come first. If a guy shows interest in you, he will have to show interest in all of you. If your hectic life means you can only hang out two times a week, he needs to be okay with that. If he’s not, he’s NOT worth your time. Of course we can compromise, but only if he is worth it. How do we find out if he is worth it? Back track to 4 sentences ago. See this cycle?
Boosting your own self-esteem (aka realizing your worth) and finding a quality guy? Two birds. One stone. DONE. Except not real birds….I’m a vegetarian :)
FINALLY, I had a weekend to reflect. To think. To sit. To walk. To breathe. To live. To just be in touch with myself.
Between the beach and the overdose of family bonding time, I achieved it. But I did lose my Ray Ban aviators at the mall earlier in the day Friday and teared up. That’s how I knew something was actually wrong.
It isn’t like me to let things bother me so much. I keep a weekly to-do list and some days, I have a daily list. Errands, chores, work, etc. – I’m on top of everything. For some reason, I just haven’t had such a tight grasp and I could feel things slipping away.
So, today is a new week. Last night when I got home, I edited the articles I needed. I wrote up a new weekly list today. I have a lot going on and I feel more capable to handle it.
Believe it or not, I even deleted tinder. It’s way too overwhelming. And honestly, I have hardly any time to hang out with my friends, how am I supposed to make time for strangers? Weirdly enough, it helped.
Bring it on, new week. I’m ready for you.
Sidenote: I was a little sad that I didn’t have a boyfriend while at dinner with my brother and his wife. But, I think that is normal.
NEW WORD ALERT: Snice – ‘so nice’. Wow, that girl is snice.
Well, well, well.
Today cannot possibly be as miserable as yesterday.
I put myself on the line, I am told by an ex to kill myself.
Another ex overnighted a late birthday package that almost made me rip my hair out due to frustration (we just do not see eye to eye).
Can you see now why I wanted to ‘cut the fat’? All of this stupid, petty nonsense is stressing me out. I have no idea how other peoples’ minds work and I’m not even trying to find out. I know that I do what I want. But it just seems I cannot escape madness and psycho personalities wherever I go. Between the hundreds of things going on in my life, I actually don’t even have time for Netflix anymore, which is kind of sad. All I want to do is relax.
I also can’t seem to figure out why I’ve been giving my time to people that aren’t worth it, yet I have so much going on. It’s like I’m having a hard time making myself a priority in my life. Yet, whenever I am in a relationship, I always put myself first and it turns into a problem.
Catch-22? I think so…..